Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Catching up to the rest of them....

One thing I have noticed about making babies or even just having a baby is that it changes you and your relationships with other people. The friends who were known as the "life of the party" and could do twice as many shots as the frat boys are now changing poopy diapers and covered in spit up. Random trips to the shore for the weekend don't happen anymore. Your friends with babies are too busy with naptime or feeding time or any other time that involves their new bundle of joy. Having a baby is a wonderful amazing experience, or so I have been told, and even though I am all about being a member in this exclusive club, its still hard to face that fact that your friendships will and are going to change. Personally, I have always felt that I have been steps behind most of my friends. When I was single, they had boyfriends. When I had a boyfriend, they were getting engaged. When I got engaged, they were already married and talking about babies. When I got married, they were my pregnant bridesmaids. Just when I thought I had finally "joined the club" and was ready to tell them about my husband and I "making babies", 2nd babies were already on their minds. Needless to say, I have been trying to catch up for years. Now that I finally feel that I am getting as close as I ever will, it seems like all my worrying and stress was for nothing.

Ultimately, I've learned that its really not a big deal if I catch up or not. Honestly, I probably never will. What I have learned from over analyzing this entire situation (which I know is a bad habit of mine and I promise will eventually stop doing) is that I need to see the bigger picture. Its not just me who is feeling left behind. A single friend of mine recently confessed that she feels I am not around enough and that marriage has changed me. It was a huge eye opener for me. I can't be upset at the friends who might be moving up in life a little faster then me because there is always going to be someone out there who feels they are trying to catch up to someone else. People will move on with life and relationships will change, so I have and am growing to accept that these changes are out of my control and part of being an adult. I am excited to have a baby, and as marriage has, having one will probably change me more. I am ok with it and hope that the friends that are not quite at where I am at, will be ok with me. I am ok with my friends who already have babies and are even working on their 2nd and even 3rd. They are going to be great resources when my time comes and I should take advantage of them being just a little ahead of me in the game.

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